Using Tinder Abroad

(Bernard Lim) #1

I am a frequent user of Tinder, and I am curious about your experiences. How has it been for you when matching with foreigners abroad? How was your experience hooking up with them?

(Thomas K. Running) #2

Hey Bernard, I’m happy to share my (limited) experience, although it sounds like we might have a bit different goals for using Tinder… Specifically, I’m not using it for “hooking up” with people.

I’m first and foremost looking for interesting, smart people with a similar outlook on life (e.g. interested in becoming or already location-independent, or at the very least internationally minded). Basically, I’m looking for people that I could see myself in a relationship with. Extra points for a cute smile or a love for doggos :dog: and good beer :beer:.

It does often feel like looking for the proverbial needle in a haystack, however, which often results in me stopping to use the app for a few weeks or months. Then, usually at a time when I feel a bit lonely (as happens quite often with this lifestyle) I pick it back up and start swiping again.

Since I’m not looking for a quick hookup, I usually use the passporting feature of Tinder Plus where you can “teleport” to a different city. There’s little point in trying to match with locals in a city I’m only staying in for a few days, so instead I’ll swipe in one of the places that I often spend time in (e.g. Lisbon or Malta) or a place I am planning an upcoming stay of a significant duration.

I was in a relationship until less than a year ago, so with my frequent long breaks from Tinder I haven’t racked up that much experience yet. I’ve actually only gone on one “Tinder date” so far, but that went quite well. We actually ended up going out for a couple months, but in the end it didn’t work out.

One thing I’ve learned, is that the only way to find out if you really like someone is to meet up in real life. All too often a chat conversation starts out well, but then as it gets longer and longer, it eventually gets a bit boring and fades out.

My advice would be to do both of you a favor and try to meet up as soon as possible to see if there’s anything there. If there is, and you go for a second date, delete Tinder from your phone. Assuming you’re looking for a serious relationship and not just a 'hookup", you owe it to yourself and the other person to give them your full attention. You can always download it again if things don’t work out.

My two cents.